a- link to original post
b-what circumstance do I believe lead to this post being written?
She has had things like this happen, and I suppose the entire situation prompted these thoughts and the writing of this post.
c-whatβs the central idea or message?
How it is to both be a child that’s the result of rape, and to have a child that is the result of rape. How it is to go through life with the knowledge, the trauma and the experience of these things.
d-whatβs the tone of the post (The author’s attitude toward the subject)?
Though it is brutally honest and an incredibly heavy subject, I feel that it’s written with some measure of distance or detachment. It is filled with emotions, yes, but she doesn’t let them rule the post. But it is personal, it is horrible, it is direct and unfiltered, though it is a great level of composure in the writings.
e-whatβs the mood of the post? (The overall atmosphere or feeling the post creates)?
The mood is heavy. It is not as dark as I would’ve expected a piece like this to be, but she still shows the severity of the subject and her experiences with it. It is emotional and personal, and it creates a picture of a horrible thing and the people that live through it.
f-how does the post make you feel?
I feel sick to my stomach. I feel extreme sorrow and empathy towards her and others in her position. I can’t imagine what it must be like to go through life with these things. And I can’t begin describing how sorry I am for my part in it. I feel guilt and shame like I barely ever have done before.
g-what do you like about the post?
I like how it raises awareness about a subject that historically hasn’t been talked about too much. It has been hid with by families and for families and society. It shows the burdens that the victims goes through, how they suffer, how they are forced to deal with things – especially the perpetrator since there is hardly any consequences for them, and how they are seen as a liability and burden because they had something horrible happeningΒ to them. I also likes the way she links to other places so there are more informations and stories that you can read and get an even better understanding how it is to survive and grow up with this in your life.
h-what do you dislike about the post?
I don’t like the fact that she has been through all of these things. How she has inherited trauma from her own mother, how she have suffered these things and that they have happened several times even. And I dislike my own part in it. I hate that I have done what I did, and that I haven’t taken any responsibility for any of it.
I-what questions does the post leave you with?
“What can I do to make anything of what I have done better?” comes to mind. I desperately want to make up for what I have done, but I have no idea how I can. I just want to show I am sorry for my part and try to make anything I can better, though I understand if there isn’t anything I can do.
j-do you connect with the post? Why or why not?
Yes and no. Yes, because I can sense her feelings and I feel such empathy for her and what she’s been through. At the same time I can’t fathom how it is to live the life she has, with the trauma she has experienced – both via her mother, but also what she has suffered herself, and to feel that when she asks for help, minimal is given and she is made to feel like a burden for what happened to her. These things I will never be able to fully understand. But I am extremely sorry for what she has gone through, and for the part I have played in it.
a- link to original post
b-what circumstance do I believe lead to this post being written?
This is first and foremost an apology to herself. But there is more as well. To me it looks like a reflection, an admittance and an explanation – not for others, but to herself – for the people she have had in her life. The people that have taken advantage of her good and kind heart, the people that have hurt her, and why she has suffered through it.
c-whatβs the central idea or message?
The message here, I think, is to show why she understand things about herself. How she has seen herself, others, hope and how she have wanted the best for people. But that the cost of it all has been herself. She Let people take from her because she believed that was what was right to do. That it was what she was worth. Now she realises differently, and is giving herself the apology she needs.
d-whatβs the tone of the post (The author’s attitude toward the subject)?
Though this is very personal and heavy, it is written with a clear language full of understanding. She is not judging herself, she is not being unfair or cruel towards herself. It is not that she is intellectualising the subject, but simply states facts, and looks at it with more compassion towards herself.
e-whatβs the mood of the post? (The overall atmosphere or feeling the post creates)?
This is highly personal, and emotional. These are things that has happened to her. That she has suffered. Yet it isn’t asking for pity. It looks like more of a “settling a dispute” with herself (in lack of a better way to phrase it). She acknowledges what she has done, apologises and learns from it. Showing actual growth.
f-how does the post make you feel?
It makes me feel a lot of different things. Some of the things are conflicting. I like that she sees and recognises these things, and is able to be kind towards herself about it. I feel empathy towards her, and I am glad she are recognising these things. At the same time I am sorry that she has experienced these situations and people like the ones written about. And I am horribly sorry for being one of them. I feel ashamed and guilty for having taken advantage of her kindness, her loyalty and her hope she saw in me. These feelings don’t really help anyone, and as I am pushing them aside, I am left with a feeling that I want to do better. For her, for myself and for other people I have in my life.
g-what do you like about the post?
I like how she doesn’t bring herself down, though she is putting some blame on herself. She isn’t using the blame to feed guilt, but instead takes it and uses it to do better. I like how it seems that she is taking careΒ ofΒ herself,Β and want to stop herself from continue this cycle she’s been living with. She is good enough to be treated with kindness, with honesty and love. And I find it inspiring. Many people live their lives for others. Allowing too much awful to happen because hey believe that it is their place in life. Maybe people can read this and find it in themselves to believe that they are worthy of love as well?
h-what do you dislike about the post?
As with many of her posts, I sent like the fact that these things has happened in her life. The things she’s been through and how she has suffered. And I really don’t like that I see myself in the people she writes about. I don’t like it because it’s true, I suppose.
I-what questions does the post leave you with?
I’m not certain if I’m left with any questions, really. It just isn’t much to question here. It is a well written piece that cuts through the point and says plainly enough what she’s trying to convey.
j-do you connect with the post? Why or why not?
And yes; I do connect with this post, I feel. On several levels. Both in what I have done to her, how I have made her feel, but also that I have felt these exact same things through much of my life. I have let others treat me as a tool to be used because that was what I believed my worth was. I haven’t gotten to the point where the author is yet, but I want to. I don’t want to feel as if I am not someone with being loved. That don’t deserve to have (healthy) boundaries.
