Mulder to Scully after Melissa died: fate: a power beyond human control that is believed to determine what happens: destiny destiny: a predetermined course of events, often held to be an irresistible power or agency People generally belong to one of two camps: 1.) why bother to do anything, life is happening to me I cannot change it 2.) fate is bullshit I have complete control over my life. My opinion about fate – it is what it is. Destiny is like the minor arcana in a tarot deck. You can read the cards as a big meh and understand that you can change your habits and avoid them. Fate is the major arcana – you are going to run into fate whether you like it or not. I waited for my fate to change because I opted out of my “chosen” destiny. Nope. Everything is the same. I slunk into a bit of a hole when I figured this out. If nothing matters… then why bother? Then you remember: ah, we are here to learn. Sometimes you learn those lessons within the first half an hour, sometimes it takes fifteen, sixty, 80 years. Some situations poke at you to help you understand yourself at a fundamental level so you can evolve deeper. Not every lesson is an easy one. Some lessons will not have a study guide or easy explanations. People will hurt you and you will hurt others. Try not to take it personally. We are all doing the best we can.