Say someone called you aย skirt chaser. This is often heard as descriptions of who you are, rather than descriptions of what you did.
โWomaniserโ and โskirt chaserโ are labels.
If you do not picture yourself as someone constantly chasing women, flirting everywhere you go, or making seduction your lifestyle, you will likely reject the labelโeven if you engaged in specific behaviours that others associate with it.
If you (for example):
* Pursued a 17-year-old while in your 30s, married, with children.
* Paying for sex acts while your wife was pregnant, exposing her to potential health risks without her informed consent.
* Seeking hookups on cheating websites while remaining married.
Those are all behaviours that fit terms like:
* serially unfaithful
* repeatedly sexually unfaithful
* habitual adulterer
* chronic infidelity
* someone who repeatedly sought sexual partners outside your marriage
Those are harder to argue with because they describe actions rather than identity.
So, โskirt chaserโ is actually one of the milder expressions. It often conjures an image of a man who flirts with lots of women.
The above behaviours listed are more serious than casual flirting because they involve deception, breaches of trust, and in one case a substantial age and power imbalances (keeping with the above examples).
The next aspect to consider: if you have cheated, why would the label bother you? You repeatedly sought sexual relationships outside your marriage.
Surely a silly label should be minimal compared to what your mistresses are called.
Words reveal what a culture chooses to forgive.
A man who repeatedly pursues women may be called a skirt chaser, a ladiesโ man, a Casanova, or even a playboy. The words range from teasing to admiring.
A woman perceived to have participated in an affair is far more likely to be called a homewrecker, a slut, a whore, a temptress, a siren, or a devil. The language is not merely descriptive. It is moral. It assumes guilt, corruption, and destruction.
Neither set of labels tells us much about the actual people involved.
Labels are often less about describing behaviour than about revealing who society believes deserves contempt.
Why get pulled toward debating the word instead of the behaviour. If the discussion becomes โAm I a skirt chaser?โ, the focus shifts away from the actions themselves.
A more productive question is, โDid I repeatedly pursue other women while married?โ
That is a factual question.
Whether someone calls that โwomanising,โ โserial infidelity,โ or โcheatingโ is almost secondary.
Keeping with the MCR countdown, I summon โThe Jetset Life Is Gonna Kill You.โ
That whole song feels like someone watching another person self-destruct while refusing to be pulled under with them. There is resignation in it. A recognition that you cannot rescue someone who will not stop making the same choices.
